TMI!

09.03.09 - Monday

Sometimes, when you have to sit in the doctor’s office for 45 minutes (I’m so sorry ma’am! We’ve just been quite backed-up today…), you can’t help but notice things you might otherwise have overlooked.

Yes, indeed, this is Too Much Information (which I’ll gladly share with you, my dear reader… haha.).

Seriously people! Give a girl a magazine or something to read if you’re gonna have me sitting in nothing but a paper gown for 45 minutes. Because the view I had was not helping to enhance today’s appointment in any way, shape, or… size.

Fore?

06.03.09 - Friday

Driving down 565 today reminded me I really need to get out my clubs & head over to the driving range. I mean, I do have a ridiculously cute Puma golf bag that is begging to see the light of day, smell the greens of the course, and take a ride in a golf cart. Like one of these. Maybe I should follow this truck. He seems to be a man with a plan! And I mean, he’s got plenty of carts… I’m sure he wouldn’t mind giving me just one. :)

Rand Drives a Ford??

05.03.09 - Thursday

FYI: I’m totally about to geek out in this post. Don’t worry about it.

I was driving home from work today, and while sitting at a light, I observed the license plate holder of the car ahead of me. Sometimes they say something funny, witty or they just blatantly advertise for the dealership from hence it was purchased. And sometimes, it is way too awesome to miss an opportunity to take an indistinguishable photo of it. Like today.

Now, seeing as that you most likely cannot read what the little plastic frame says, let me just tell you in short, it says something about Two Rivers.

This only means something to anyone if you’ve read (or, like me, are currently reading) the Wheel of Time series by Robert Jordan.

Think of WoT (Wheel of Time) as the Lord of the Rings series on crack. And 4 times longer. And yet to be completed. And sans hobbits.

Thanks for the real-world cameo Rand.

Mmm… Rand.


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What I Need Is A Superhero - Care of Lauren Calvert

27.02.09 - Friday

This is an email I got from my amazing friend Lauren in response to an email I sent her about the awesomeness of my horrid dreams... Oh Lauren, how I love thee...

"Wow.... That's super disturbing.

And that [He Who Shall Not Be Named] dream is pissing me off because I really hate hearing those are endlessly coming up.

The [Co-Worker] one was just pretty funny though.

You need to create a superhero in waking life and really think hard about him, a lot, and all the time. So he'll morph into your dreams and rescue you from this [He Who Shall Not Be Named]! OH OH maybe this super hero is at Sharp Top this weekend!!!!!!!!!!!

Just like these kids ...
( for your viewing pleasure )











































Oh yeah. And the guy that you meet that's a potential husband-to-be I have some things to talk with him about and one of those will be proposal ideas. Such as this one -



haha- only because I still believe in fairy tales, I'd love this one!"

She seriously had me nearly crying from silent laughter in my office... :)

Chloe's Gonna Die!

26.02.09 - Thursday

How’d you like the title of today's post? Intrigued? A bit offended? A bit… concerned?

Yes, well, when I first read these words, I nearly burst out laughing. Which wouldn’t have been so bad if I wasn’t standing right behind someone in the Publix check-out line. . . alone. . . and not on my cell phone.

Whoever came up with these absurd headlines should get a pay-raise. They definitely caught my attention.

It’s just too bad for Chloe. But don’t worry honey. You’ll probably come back in 6 months after a miraculous brain transplant, a phenomenal case of mistaken identity or as part of a fantastic mob plot.


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A Closer Look.

25.02.09 - Wednesday

Please examine this ring.



Please examine my face.


Need a closer look?



Note to Self: Don’t rest your face on your right hand while sleeping.




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Fire Cookie!

24.02.09 - Tuesday

Once upon a time there were two lovely ladies. These two lovely ladies went to see a showing of “Harry Potter & something or another” (I mean, who can honestly remember which one of the many installations we witnessed that night!? But that detail is unimportant, and I digress...) at the Red Rocks Amphitheatre in Morrison, Colorado. Before the showing of such a fantastic film (the one I can’t remember…) there was a, well, I’m not sure talented is the right world, but in general, a live band playing to entertain the lovely ladies until the sun set & they could enjoy our outdoor movie.

This band began playing a song and repeating incomprehensible lyrics, resulting in the two lovely ladies hearing the following words over & over: “Fire Cookie! Fire Cookie!” Ummm… What?? Turns out, the man was saying “fire cooking under me” or some such nonsense, but by the time the lovely ladies figured this out, they were already quite attached to the phrase “Fire Cookie” and thus, created matching nick-names for each other. So, this post is dedicated to none other than my Fire Cookie.

Now, Fire Cookie, otherwise known as Lauren Duker, just recently moved into a long awaited perfect home with her beau, and on such an occasion, I decided her walls needed some Becky love. This is the final product of such love for her & her walls.



Needless to say, she loved it. ;)


The best part about all of this? The trip to the post office. Please gander at this man standing in the exhaustingly long line in front of me. Yes, he is indeed balancing his package on his head while his hands busily complete some other task, keeping him from actually holding his mail. Hats off, or shall I say, envelopes off, to you sir.

You've Got Mail.

23.02.09 - Monday

Good morning inbox.
Good morning facebook.
I see Joel & Tyler send their love...



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Crack Cream? No Thanks, I'm Good. . .

22.02.09 - Sunday

Who doesn’t love a lazy Sunday afternoon? Well, I know I do, but this wasn’t one of those days. . . Only because it was filled with geocaching adventures, hilarious merchandise discoveries & edible grass.

Now, to begin our story, let me share my new addiction to geocaching. Geocaching = treasure hunting = stupendous! Intrigued? You should be!
Well, today our geocache selections took us to the Five Points area in Huntsville, which also took us to Star Market.

Now, Star Market is a very small, very expensive grocery store that sells many a unique ware. Such as. . .


Yes. Crack Cream & Butt Paste. A much needed addition to your medicine cabinet, to be sure. . .

After deciding no one in our group was in need of these distinctive items, we meandered over, around, on, atop, across, upon, along, between, among & near some railroad tracks and found our way to The Lumberyard. If you’re looking for a swing made out of tarp, an old, 3-legged bathtub, or a Grateful Dead mega-scale, well, you’ve come to the right place. . .

At the end of such a long, eventful afternoon, it is necessary to stop in to Garden Cove Produce Center to pick up some green, nutritious. . . grass. Yup, it’s in the cheese section. And it’s on sale! Hurry in!

February 22, you made my day.

Free & Fun!

I heart Grosgrain. I also heart the fact that she gives away free stuff. Like this stuff:

Pincushion Ring

Brass Hussy

Kline Necklace

Milk Weed Skirt

Loose Teeth Sundress

Blueberry Pie Frock

And, um, this totally made my day:

"You've probably heard 'An apple a day keeps the doctor away.'
New research suggests a plump apple bottom might do the same."

Meet Allen.

21.02.09 - Saturday

I would like everyone to meet Allen.

He’s a retired greyhound racing dog. And he’s absurdly tall. And he’s absurdly friendly.

Lauren & I met Allen at the Huntsville Dog Park this weekend when we took Rigley to get some social interaction. Too bad Rigley is completely indifferent to other dogs, and rather than playing with them in the park, he made friends with all the other people there. Oh Rigley.

But Allen. Oh Allen. Allen has a special talent. He has a talent to find idle hands & find a use for them. Such as using them to pet him. And since he’s so freakishly tall, he could walk right up to you, lean against your leg & your hand would be at the perfect level to pat his side while it hung there unused.
Another trick of Allen’s was to squeeze in-between people. And, well, there wasn’t actually much squeezing, because the dog’s so skinny, that even when Lauren & I were standing barely a foot apart, he would just meander on up and amble in-between us in order to position himself just so by leaning against one of our legs & silently demand a good rub down.

Smart dog that Allen. Smart dog.

What Did YOU Accomplish Before 8:30 am This Morning??

20.02.09 - Friday

Alright folks,
This Friday morning was unlike any normal, welcomed Friday morning. In as such, I would like to share my Friday, the 20th of February morning with you all, since, well, in my opinion, it couldn't get any weirder. Alright. Here goes...


6:30 - 7:15 - All is well. Normal waking up rituals.

7:15 - 7:25 - Walk Rigley (the dog I'm dog-sitting...) Meanwhile, get to the end of the street and see something on a neighbor's back balcony. Um. What?? Yup. A Bovinae of sorts...

Indeed, a cow.

7:45 - 7:50 - Start drive to work. Realize I need gas. I know there are gas stations on Governor's Blvd. "Let's go there!" I think...

7:52 - Pull into gas station next to something that resembled this:

What's up playa!?

7:53 - Start pumping gas. Get the head-to-toe look-over from "friendly" gentleman walking out of gas station. Begin to realize maybe this wasn't the best idea... I start praying vehemently to my friend Jesus.

7:54 - A couple different cars have pulled up next to different pumps. But they are not actually pumping any gas... Continue praying...

7:55 - Giant Chevy Suburban rolls in blasting something incoherent due to enormous amounts of bass & indistinguishable curse words & terribly inappropriate phrases. Don't worry though. This guy was sporting a Tweety Bird air freshener.

Totally gangsta.

7:55.3 - Large man steps out of still-running Suburban with smoke streaming after him... "Smoking cigarettes at a gas station? Not a very smart man..." I think to myself... Oh. Wait. That's not cigarette smoke..........

7:55.6 - Woman from next car over, pulling off the mullet with bleached streak hair-do & bedroom slippers, jumps into the passenger side of still-running Suburban, looks very inconspicuous while inhaling & exhaling some indiscernible smoke-like substance until the driver of said Suburban returns to the driver seat, when she then exits. Continue to pray for forgiveness for my stupidity in gas station choices...

Something similar to this lovely woman's "do."

7:57 - Woman from a second car wearing a body too big for her clothes runs up to the Suburban's passenger side window, which proceeds to roll down. Mumbles something I gladly couldn't hear. Apparently does not get the response she desired from Suburban man. Stalks away upset. I start thinking this gas pump doesn't work, because it seems to be taking forever to fill my tank...

7:58 - 7:59 - Finally done pumping gas. Do everything in my power not to run around to my driver's side door. Big Suburban starts to pull towards me as I walk around. I continue with ardent prayer. Man then backs his car up to shout "Cry Baby! Cry Baby!" to woman with ill-fitting clothing. I jump in my car & pull away onto the road next to a safe little blue Toyota Prius.

7:59 - 8:03 - Thank God for keeping me alive. Ask for forgiveness for my ineptitude in choosing gas stations.

8:04 - Change lanes on I-565. See postcard-sized piece of something flying towards my car in the corner of my eye as I'm changing lanes. Postcard-sized piece of something turns out to be thick chunk of wood. Wood hits my windshield at something around 75 mph, accomplishing three things at once.

1. Scaring the bejeezes out of me.
2. Cracking my windshield.
3. Giving me the chance to thank God for such a challenging morning in order for me to truly appreciate my Friday all that much more...

8:07 - Somehow manage to make it to work in one piece.

8:08 - Walk in and immediately start sharing my morning adventure with my area-mate Tom, who drops his jaw & asks, "Why on EARTH would you get gas on Governor's Blvd??"
I say, "Because I thought it would be fine at 8am in the morning."
"Becky, Becky, Becky... Governor's Blvd is not an acceptable place to stop at ANY time of the day. Well, I'm just glad you didn't get shot or propositioned."
Thanks for the concern Tom.


So... How does this compare to YOUR morning???

Bee Spit

17.02.09 - Tuesday

Today, I would merely like to share my love for bee spit, better known as honey.

This along with my love for using it as a sweetener, a cooking agent, a sore throat soother, and more often than not, a snack. Yup. I eat this delicious bee byproduct by the spoonfuls. This, I believe, is not primarily triggered by the deliciousness of the honey in itself, but by the container I have chosen to store it in & the serving utensil that has been bestowed upon me to use in order to retrieve the sweet nectar.

You see, when you live in Colorado, you tend to collect particular treasures from the oddities of the places & people constantly surrounding you, such as, the oddities that come from a wonderful, magical land known as Boulder. Boulder is not only the home to the University of Colorado, year-round, bare-foot hippies, an astonishing amount of an astonishing array of “herbs,” giant wind turbines & brilliant restaurants who serve 99¢ Bloody Marys during the weekends, but also a marvelous company known as Celestial Seasonings. Mmmm…. tea…

Now, to tie this little tangent into my honey obsession, it is fairly well known that people enjoy the golden liquid with their teas in order to sweeten the otherwise slightly bitter or bland beverages. Sometimes little, plastic containers in the shapes of bears & beehives decorate tea trays, spice cabinets & office kitchens, but myself, I prefer to store my honey in an old jar obtained from my grandparents. While having a solid, glass container prevents me from squeezing the delightful honey into my teas, this is not a concern to me, because I have a splendid utensil to help me retrieve my sweet nectar. It is a special, beautiful honey spoon. You just use this baby to scoop out some honey & then park it right there on side of your steaming cup of brewed magnificence to let it slowly flow into the hot liquid. Well, either that, or bypass the cup entirely & obtain immediate satisfaction by directing that spoon directly into your mouth, such as I do.

Alright, well, there you have it.


I love honey.





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